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Finished or not finished

Posted On 2014 Jul 29
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Jannelle So_So LAI feel like how I used to feel at the end of timed exams when the teacher would say: “Pens down. Now more writing. Finished or not finished, pass your papers.”

I am both excited and anxious; relieved yet feeling like there are still a million things that needs to be done; because after about a lifetime of dreaming about it and 6 months of planning it, July 20 has come… It’s time to walk down the aisle. And whether or not we’re done with the planning, the wedding will go on.

Jannelle So Wedding gown by Carlyn Nuyda-Calloway of Thumbelina Atelier Mr. & Mrs. Perkins' Wedding by KLK Photography)

Jannelle So Wedding gown by Carlyn Nuyda-Calloway of Thumbelina Atelier Mr. & Mrs. Perkins’ Wedding by KLK Photography)

As I mentioned last week, I did learn a lot from planning this wedding – things I hopefully won’t be needing after my first and hopefully only wedding. And so I thought those lessons will be better shared. Here are the rest of what I’m calling “The 10 Commandments of Wedding Planning.”

6. Thou shall steal (or borrow) ideas.
While as young girls, we grew up planning and visualizing our wedding, it’s good to be flexible with ideas. I read some magazines, checked out bridal shows, but more importantly, listened to the experts we hired to help with the wedding – coordinator, designer, florist, etc. I realized that even social media is a good source for wedding trends that are worth incorporating. I started following some accounts on Twitter and Instagram, to get more wedding ideas.

7. Thou shall not commit the mistake of thinking “There’s still time.”
There will never be enough time. I learned to make decisions quickly and when I thought of doing something, I learned that I shouldn’t postpone anything for tomorrow, if I could do it today. There’s lots to be done… especially for a destination wedding. Aside from the usual ceremony and reception requirements and details, we are treating our guests to a tour of the quaint town, with stops in historic and interesting spots, aboard a vintage trolley. Then, the rehearsal and rehearsal reception; and the day-after brunch. All that have to be coordinated and planned, too! If you don’t watch it, time will creep up on you and catch you wishing you could produce more hours or somehow manipulate it to tic-toc slower.

Jannelle So Wedding gown by Carlyn Nuyda-Calloway of Thumbelina Atelier Mr. & Mrs. Perkins' Wedding by KLK Photography)

Jannelle So Wedding gown by Carlyn Nuyda-Calloway of Thumbelina Atelier Mr. & Mrs. Perkins’ Wedding by KLK Photography)

8. Thou shall bear and communicate clearly realistic wishes for your wedding. How do you like the invitations done? What message are you communicating? What kind of flowers do you want? What about the cake? What flavor do you want to serve your guests? And the look of the cake? Topper or no topper? And the rentals? Swirly plates or plain, other designs? Round or square or some other shape? What kind of chair? Yes… Down to the table napkins. All this sets the tone for a couple’s special day. And for mine, since by this time, I had already been influenced by experts and social media accounts, incorporated with what I’ve been dreaming of, I had pictures in my mind of what I wanted. But the challenge was communicating my ideas to vendors, so they can execute my plans. Luckily, I have a very artistic fiancé (a VP, Creative Director for a division of CBS) who writes very, very clear briefs. The vendors found it refreshing… a clear direction of what needs to be done… And coming from the groom?! I am the luckiest bride!

Mr. & Mrs. Perkins' Wedding by KLK Photography

Mr. & Mrs. Perkins’ Wedding by KLK Photography

9. Thou shall not covet. When you’re done deciding on wedding design, theme, motiff and effects, it’s time to stop looking for other ideas. Indecision is your worst enemy. It is costly to keep changing instructions to vendors; more so changing vendors midway. Luckily, I did not go through anything like this. I found the most amazing vendors, starting off with the best wedding coordinator in town, in my book, Rocio Nuyda, who have been guiding me through everything. Now, with a few hours left before the wedding, I don’t wish I did this or that; I don’t wish I had this or that… I know I made the right choices that are suited to mine and my fiance’s taste and more importantly, our wedding budget.

10. Thou shall not worry about the wedding.After this one day, what lies ahead is a marriage that will hopefully last a lifetime. That is worth planning for and working on.

Jannelle So is taking a break from 20-years of print and broadcast journalism career that began in the Philippines and continued here in the US. Connect to her on Facebook (www.facebook.com/JannelleSoOFFICIAL); Twiiter (www.twitter.com/JannelleSo); and Instagram (www.instagram.com/JannelleSo) or email her at sojannelle77@gmail.com.

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